Each day it seems like I understand a little bit more about where I have been, where I am now and where I am going to - and it feels as if all I have done in the past few years has been a massive preparation and shift to allow the beautiful realisation of many of my dreams to occur round about now :o)
Firstly pushing myself through university made me become very independent, created many opportunities for me to discover what I do like (care work, foreign languages, travelling, writing) and what I don't like (irregular hours of work, pressure to meet deadlines, academia). From this I can begin to create a reality which is right for me rather than doing what I think I should do.
Secondly, my work at the nursery is wonderful in so many ways - I am finally working with children and being in Cambridge means there are plenty of babies whose first language is not English so I get to hear their parents speaking in French, German, Spanish, Italian... I love it and if only I can build up the courage to go for it I could ask them to talk to me in their own language sometimes so I can improve my German and French skills and pick up some Spanish and Italian ones. I have dreamt for years of being multilingual but university made me feel that would never be possible. Coming out of academia and realising that actually I *am* good at languages but I prefer to have a wide range of skills rather than becoming perfect in one or two languages tops has made me realise that it is possible after all.
The nursery has also made me open my eyes to how daycare works in Britain and has made me passionate about someday working towards improving it in some way - no I don't have impossible dreams lol but I do feel that my work may take me into trying to add certain things to whee I work - like using my languages or my creativity somehow within it - or moving to work with disabled children more...
Somehow, someday (or over a period of years more likely) I will see how all this comes together perfectly, which I believe it is doing and will continue to do. And this makes me happy! I am not somebody who can devote herself completely to one project but has to have a foot in many different things - and I am sure something will turn up to allow me to do that...
The nursery itself had a big meeting the other day and they have promised us many more resources, more staff and much more which, provided they carry out their promises, will make our work easier and more enjoyable and in turn make it better for the babies and parents too. This gives me hope that things will pick up! They are also suggesting we do 4 long days rather than 5 normal days giving a better continuity of care throughout the day. This means the shifts would be either 6:45-5:30 or 7:30-6:15 VERY long days but something I am considering because a) a day off in the week would be helpful b) I travel for 2 hours per day and so never get much done in the evenings anyway - a full day off without travelling would give me time to get other things done.
They are also suggesting that perhaps we move up through the nursery with our keychildren - which means we get to see the children progress and get to know them really well and their parents and also gives us variety rather than seeing a child for 4 months and then getting a new one to have to get to know, understand etc... sounds like a pretty good idea to me!
All in all I have hope that they are finally realising what a state our nursery was in and are actually wanting to make some real changes. However it is gonna take some time and I don't know if I am being moved units in all the changes - but as my room leader handed in her notice yesterday I doubt they will move anyone from our unit because that only leaves 2 full time and a part time assistant for our unit. I have also told my room leader she needs to spend the next month showing me the ins and outs of the paperwork because without her we are going to be stuffed!!
So lots of change is happening but it all feels good so far and it is all starting to fall into place!
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